Posts tagged to
10 Things I Love to do! :)
1) Sing
2) Write
3) Yoga
4) Laugh
5) Play Guitar
6) Cook
7) Blog
8) Reminisce
9) Smile
10) Snuggle
Boys - all I really want is boys
And in the morning it’s boys
Cause in the evening it’s boys
Boys - to do the dishes
Boys - to clean up my room
Boys - to do the laundry
Boys - and in the bathroom
Boys - that’s all I really want is boys!
Two at a time - I want boys
Boys - to fan me with palm leaves
Boys - to take me shopping
Boys - to make me breakfast
BOYS!!!
”
I’m in Austin! I’m already in love with this place! Can’t wait to move here! Transfer Student Session & Counselor Appt tomorrow morning followed by a guided campus tour! :)
Consideration isn’t only for other people! Remember to be considerate to yourself first! You can’t give to someone else what you aren’t giving to yourself! You may think you are giving it without needing to give it to yourself, but in all honesty you are giving it to them in hopes that they will give it back in order to fulfill your own need for it. In the end you will realize that it couldn’t come from anyone else. It has to come from you! You deserve to get it from yourself!
So…..You wanna get to know me?
I have recently decided to quit all this anonymous stuff and just get comfortable with sharing with you guys! I mean this blog is for me!
So I am 32 years old and I am getting divorced!!!! I was foolish most of my life! Believing in things like fairytales and if you were a perfect enough person you could make someone love you!!!! You could wrap them up! They would be obsessed and never look anywhere ever again!
Not the case! I was 14 the first time I remember actually seeing him! We were at a roller skating rink. He skated really really well! Plus he was so fricking cute! He had a chipped tooth all Lloyd from Dumb and Dumber style! He wore one of those ponchos. Ya know from Mexico. He called it the rug of wisdom! Wish he had some wisdom!
Long story short, he joined the military to get us out of the small town we were from! We were suppose to go to some place in the states! I would go to college he would be in the military. We would eventually get married and have a huge ceremony! (I am my grandmother’s child! I had to have a huge ceremony or I would be disowned even if she was dead! It didn’t matter!) Surprise, surprise! He got orders to Italy. My options were to get married and go with him or see him when he comes home on leave!
Being the co-dependent person I am, of course I was getting married! I mean we were both suppose to be getting out of North Dakota together! He couldn’t just leave me there! So we got married. I had always been head over heels in love with him! I chased him over half my life!
After years of neglect, which I was quite comfortable with because my mother had done the same thing, I had, had enough!!!!!!!!!! No more feeling worthless while he oooooohhhhh and aaaaahhhhhh over someone’s big tits! No more not getting calls! No more I’d rather get drunk and not call you then not get drunk and spend the night with you!
It was done! It is done! I have lived most of my life making other people happy! Supporting them in their goals! Supporting them in their endeavors and overall journey! That is OVER! I am supporting myself and my daughter!
I am not on this earth to make anyone’s life better but my own! I have been left in the dust time and time again! Why would I care about someone who doesn’t even care about me enough to actually call me and say hey not gonna make it?
Towards men at this point I am extremely bitter. I want to treat them like I have been treated by their gender! Use you up for my benefit!!!!!! And don’t think I won’t accidentally do something that I think is no big deal and makes you feel like a worthless piece of shit! :)
